Begin Again novel Chapter 164

His heart imploded in his chest with love so intense, so complete it threatened to incapacitate him when his gaze fell on the miniature version of himself sleeping peacefully in his little cot in the smaller bedroom he assumed belonged to Brenda.

He was still getting used to the immense love brimming in his heart when a wave of grief so profound, so life-consuming, washed over him, and he fell to his knees.

And he wept, for all the time he had lost with his son, all the memories he wasn't in, and all the milestones he'd missed.

All the anger and confusion he's felt since James dropped off the paternity report, the sense of betrayal he'd tried to ignore the whole afternoon, culminated in that moment of total despair when all he could do was weep because if he didn't— if he held it all in—he was convinced it would eat him up and swallow him whole or he'd fly into a murderous rage.

Liam knelt on the floor in front of his son for the longest time, his broken sobs reverberating through the room.

He wept until he had no more tears in him.

Completely gutted and emotionally exhausted, he stood up, pushed Aiden's legs back under the blanket, and tucked him in.

"Hey, Kool-Aid, it's Dad," he whispered as he gently took his hand, marvelling at how tiny it was. "I'm sorry it took me so long to get here. I didn't know about you. I would have gotten here much sooner if I knew. I would have fought so hard to be here—"

His phone buzzed in his pocket, interrupting his peaceful moment with his son.

He pulled it out quickly and rejected Clara's call before leaning over the crib to kiss Aiden on his forehead.

His baby smell hit him hard, and once again, he was free-falling and drowning in the pool of raw, unrestrained love.

He smelled like Eden—that same light floral scent—and baby shampoo. It could be baby powder too. But Liam wasn't so sure because he didn't know shit about babies. Whatever it was— shampoo or baby powder—it was now his favourite scent, right up there with Eden's.

His phone pinged again, and this time he couldn't ignore it. It was Linda calling to check if he was still feeling homicidal.

"I'm on my way," he told her and hung up.

Liam was surprised to see Eden at the door. He'd completely forgotten he's not alone.