The slap across my face isn't a hard one, but with the bruises around my jaw from the beating I took last night after I killed another one of Lucca's men, it stings like a bitch.

“You should see how she screamed. Beggar, Beggar,” he laughs as he mimics Kylie's voice.

Every day he shows me a small video, forcing me to watch what his men do to Kylie.

It is fucking sick. I have experienced her torture for hours. For her, it has been weeks.

I lost the number of days that have gone by. My mind closes in, my body weakens from lack of food, water, and the amount of pain I am in. But I welcome it, knowing that hers is so much more severe. I should be there and she should be here.

For Lucca that is too easy for me.

“Rape,” he said last week, “is something that once it happens the first time, the other times just don't hold a candle.”

He doesn't know how wrong he is.

It only hurts more.

Every time a bit of your soul chips away until you got nothing left.

I know she screams for me.

When she is sleeping, she cries, begging me to kill her.

She wants to die.

Kylie is at another warehouse in Washington.

Lucca thought it was funny that his men rape and torture her in Vincent's territory.

a dark soul, he was born with madness that made

have seen it with

as I do.

cursed soul, is much worse than a man

Six Years Ago

I stopped believing in people's bullshit because I knew better, I learned all my lessons in the worse possible

why did I trust

think he was

is different, yeah really fucked

with a dislocated shoulder or maybe

on my left side under my naked bruised breast presses underneath the tissue

but I am too weak to care,

have no scream left in

My voice is fucked.

It's gone.

the day, it's like I am

it will be the

my stomach I would just

a van, maybe they're back, maybe he is

I have his spawn growing inside me, and he will

them that is how weak I am- A white older man, with glasses and a fat ass woman. My hands instinctively cover my breast, my eyes hard as I stare at these

help her out, get the van and some rope, call Junior," I

is in there, they

the truth, but I don't say anything, even if I wanted to, I don't think

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