Their End, My Beginning

It is 8:00pm now and no sign of Ryder I have no idea what made him not want to come today even after my pleading even though I was being dragged out by his bodyguards. My parents cared, loved, and saw him like their own son. I used to feel jealous seeing the way my parents care for him but felt happy that my family love him and I don’t have to convince my parents; he is the one for me. That was something I didn’t want to happen after seeing my friend’s love life. They had to either go against their parents or forget their love. I was one lucky girl.

I can’t believe all these is happening to me. The life I thought was perfect is being turned upside down. Hell, the perfect life I had is no longer there making me feel dead. If someone had told me that this was going to happen, I would have made him to go to asylum. Well, now, I know the things I thought were perfect were not permanent. God, how I wish this is just a dream and that my dad would wake me up with his sweet kiss and a pat on my head.

I sat in front of their graves, cried and cried, telling them everything. From the moment I found out about the accident, I couldn’t breathe, felt that the ground should swallow me up, wished I was with them. I kept on asking for their help, kept screaming and crying. No amount of words can describe how I feel right now. These feelings are suffocating me I want to escape this but how.

Suddenly, I felt the wind blowing on my face. I felt something tugging in my heart. My stomach fluttering with butterflies. Why do I feel strange, the feeling that I got whenever I see Ryder in a distance, just that thought made me stand up from the ground and turn around but saw no one? I am imagining things again. This has started from the moment I was in hospital. I better go to uncle Nat’s house and lay on the bed and after I close my eyes, I would no longer imagine things, otherwise I will turn crazy.

And so, I did the exact thing; I was too tired to change my clothes. The moment I lay on the bed, I fell into deep slumber. I saw a beautiful dream where my parents, Ryder and I were spending our time together like old times. How I wish I just stayed there. Forever.

------

of waking up, eating for the sake of living, laying on bed. I didn’t talk to anyone. Uncle Nat tried to talk to me to cheer me as possible, but seeing that I will not change my routine he just left me to be. What I felt strange was the fact that I didn’t see or hear anything

me and cheer me up. Now when

standing on our door porch on soaked in

that uncle Nat didn’t mind Mandy staying with me. I gave her my clothes; she took it and went to bathroom to change and I also changed into new clothes. When she came back, I asked

woke up next was Mandy’s sobs. I asked her what’s wrong, and she apologized. Now I was really

are you apologizing

lying. Which made me more confused, seeing that she never lied. Which made her bad at lying to me. But I chose to ignore it, seeing that it wasn’t a perfect time

wanted to be alone.” which

never thought of our lives to be like this.” I could see it in her eyes that there’s a behind meaning to it. “We had plans. To go