“Ross, when you were saying if there was anything you could do….”
“Of course….”
“Could you put some food together. Light easy finger food. Something appetising. Hospital food is….”
“No problem Mr Haswell. Leave me with it.”
A couple of hours later, Ross has performed a minor miracle. “I know you said finger-food, but they need something solid inside them. But I’ve put it all in individual containers, so it will be easy to eat.”
“That’s perfect. Thank you.”
“If there’s anything else, just call me.”
“We will.”
“And tell Charlotte and Michael that we’re all thinking of them.”
“We’ll do that.”
Carrying Ross’ food offerings, we go to James’ room, then hesitate uncertainly at the door.
There is no sign of Michael.
James is still lying there, eyes closed, lost to the world. A monitor pings at regular intervals. Charlotte is there. She’s not noticed us, sitting by the bed with her back turned. Holding his hand, she kisses the fingers, talking quietly to him.
“…. I know you always worried about being older than I am…. But I still thought we were going to have years and years together…. Now…. What am I supposed to do? With you like this? I love Michael too, but it’s supposed to be the three of us. Don’t leave me, Master. Please don’t leave me….”
And the sobs come again, racking her body as she shakes and weeps over him.
Oh, God….
How long can this go on?
What can I do?
What can I do?
her arms around her, I hold her hands. But it’s not us she
hissed curse. I turn. It’s Michael, hair
were asleep….” Then to me.
for you,” says
grateful look. “That’s great, thanks. Charlotte, c’mon, eat.” He unclips a container
It’s his mother’s recipe
her face away, her mouth working, looking ready to vomit. “I’m not
into a dish, pushing it to her. “Yes, you are. You just
answer. “Charlotte, eat.” He purses his lips for a moment then, “Charlotte. James would want you to
amount and puts it in her mouth. She chews
can’t go on like
corridor. He wavers, looking at Charlotte uncertainly, but Elizabeth says, “I’ll stay
nods, blinking hard, then follows me out to
going to stay the course like
job to
“And who’s supporting you?”
doesn’t reply, simply folding his arms
Change the subject….
when the ambulance crew were treating him, when the fibrillation failed, they asked you for permission
and
more about this than me. Why was
almost shuddering. “It’s unreliable. It can result in brain damage. All that business you see in the movies, adrenaline straight into the heart, it’s rubbish. A Hollywood myth. Adrenaline is
Jeez….
me in the eye. “…. it’s my
Christ….
“Does…. Charlotte know this?”
not said anything.
“No, of course not.”
What can I offer…?
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