Clubrooms Diary

LISA

May 8th 2018

I crash through the changing room door, on the verge of bringing up last nights dinner. I hate that I'm too shy to tell Chad I'm not okay with him asking me for kisses. But I feel like it's expected of me because I work here, I'm not like the other girls. I don't sleep with the clients, I only deal with the girls. I'm the one they come to see when they require new outfits, toys, supplies, etc. You could say I run the house and I think that's why Chad tries to play

'Mummy and Daddies' with me. I think I'd rather curl over die first.

I've tried to explain to him that I'm not interested. I'm just not into men, I'm purely into women. The fact that I slightly feel repulsed by him plays a major factor in it as well. But It's not like I haven't been with a man before because I have on numerous occasions. But the D just isn't for me, They're the ugliest things my eyes have ever had the opportunity to greet. I love my job and I love the girls. They're a sweet bunch who's just misunderstood by the community.

And just like the girls here at  Clubrooms wasn't on my top of the list dream job to pursue. We all have a story to tell, a past we never want catching up to us and a future we're destined to seek out. I was fortunate enough to have been given the blessing of growing up in a loving and caring home.

Raised by the best, and taught by the best. My siblings and I use to say.

My parents always showed us so much affection, I guess that's why I have trouble telling Chad to bugger off. I'm a people pleaser, I make it my goal to make sure everyone around me is always comfortable with every decision I make, even if it doesn't concern them. 

With a slight speed bump when I came out and told my family I was gay. I was Nineteen years old, and I realized I could never settle down and marry someone I know I would never truly be happy with. And it wouldn't have been fair to him too. My coming out caused a huge rift between my family and to this day, seventeen years later only my mother and two sisters speak to me. My father refused to acknowledge me once the words left my mouth and I reassured him I was certain that I could never love a man. My brother still hasn't found it in his heart to forgive me for breaking his best friends heart. 

I head back towards the bar after gargling half a bottle of mouthwash, hoping and praying Chads left. I swear I can virtually feel his eyes stripping me bare, assaulting my body with his beady eyes and sends my body into a state of emergency trembling catastrophe. I walk through the bar, my eyes scoping the room out and my body instantly relaxes when he's nowhere to be seen. I step behind the bar and start the process of doing a stock take, picking up each hot bottle and weighing them. We have a system where we divide the MLS of the bottle into measured shots. Then when the months over I collect the data from the til hard drives and match it with my written data I do weekly. Chad has a bad habit of drinking the liquor without writing it up. He'll blame the girls and deduct it from their tips. Most times I don't think he's forgotten, he's just a penny-pinching bully. I get through the hot bottles and start counting the pre-mixes and beer bottles with my back facing the other side of the bar. 

"Ah is the bar open for service?" The manly voice cuts into my train of thinking. 

"One moment." I hold a finger up, trying to concentrate.

"Scotch, neat about three fingers high when you're ready." He casually says. 

I wave my hand at him again trying not to lose count. When I'm done, I straighten and pour him a scotch.

"Heads up" I call out as I slide it along the bar countertop. 

"I don't fucking believe it." He laughs. "Lisa. Lisa turner is that you?"  

I look up and my eyes find him sitting four seats down the bar. 

"Jimmy?" I deadpan.

takes a

on earth are you doing

came to pay someone

"Really?" I chuckle. 

to see my ex sister in law." His eyes

here I thought you came to

didn't know you worked here."

haven't spoken to him or dad in seventeen years."

with me three months before I came out." Confusion

up telling him the truth when you left town. The real reason why he hasn't spoken to you Lisa was because

did he find out?" I

called you the devil in disguise and you were leading her daughter to

too wasn't he?" I asked.

was."

me then?" I look up at him.

hurt him less to let you

last

Nick called out to me

"Who?" I cried. 

heartbroken." He

What are you talking about?' I didn't understand what

play scissor sisters with some

towards me. Jimmy was the one who broke up with me and got with Nicki. He's the reason why I decided to give

it was I who got a surprise. I walked in on Jimmy laying on top of Nicki with his hand up her top and his mouth over hers. I didn't yell or cry out even though every nerve in my body screamed too.  I just quietly closed the door behind me and sobbed the whole drive back home. He had the nerve

me. She had heard about Jimmy and I taking a break, but she knew the truth behind his ruling. I mean, everyone in town knew his reason, he was quick to flaunt off in front of his mates who his new side candy was.  Rachel invited me back to her house and not wanting to be alone I agreed. We were up in her room, she implied we hit the club and I couldn't find it in my heart

swaying to the beat of the music when a pair of hands slid around my waist, I was pulled back and I

play kitty cat?" A deep

erection up against me and my eyes landed on Rachels barely containing to stay in their sockets with panic. She sensed my uneasiness, she stepped forward, wrapped her arms around my neck and brushed her lips lightly over mine. She licked the seam of my lips then covered my mouth with hers, our tongues found each other, slowly intertwining together rhythmically creating

hands that once rested upon my hips slowly left, the room slowly became quiet and everyone began to disappear. My senses were only aware of Rachel

I licked

She pressed light kisses along my

anything up until now."