I can't believe I almost just told Logan that I loved her. That would be insane, I've only known her for a couple of weeks, but however I feel about her, I do know that I've never felt this way before. She's the strongest person I know, but also the softest in the way she loves and cares for people, and I'm the lucky son of a bitch who gets to be included on that list.
I also can't believe I just almost cried in front of her. I absolutely never cry. Thankfully, I controlled it and kept it together. I want to be strong for her so she can let her guard down when she needs to, but it pains me to know that she was struggling alone last year.
I lie down on my side, facing Logan as I continue to stroke her cheek with my thumb until the few tears of hers stop falling. Usually, when girls cry in front of me, I want nothing to do with it, but with her, I feel honored that she would be so vulnerable with me. Knowing her private and tough nature, I would imagine that she doesn't cry very often.
"I need to tell you something," She says, breaking the silence. "And you're probably not going to like it," She adds.
My stomach instantly drops.
I swallow hard as I brush the fallen tendrils of hair behind her ear. "Okay," I say softly, but it comes out in more of a question form.
She pauses, making the beat of my heart pound harder against my chest. Something is wrong. I can feel it. What the fuck is going on?
She gives me one last longing look before closing her eyes, inhaling deeply, and saying, "I'm a virgin" on the exhale.
I let out a long sigh of relief. That's it? That's what she was worried about telling me?
"Okay," I state as I lean forward to kiss her lips while her eyes are still closed.
They instantly shoot open. "Okay? That's it?" She asks, perplexed.
"Okay... yeah, that's about it," I tell her as I nod my head.
"It doesn't bother you?" She asks, searching my face with confusion plastered on hers.
"Should it bother me?" I ask in return. I haven't been with a virgin since I was a sophomore in high school, but honestly, it doesn't bother me one bit. Surprising maybe, because look at her. She's absolutely stunning, and the fact that no one has tried to fuck her yet is mind-blowing.
"It bothers most guys," She states matter of factly.
"Well then, I guess I'm not most guys. I already told you this wasn't just about sex for me," I reassure her as I pull her closer to me, trying to keep my eyes focused on her face and not on her chest that's currently pressed up against me and spilling out of her black satin bra.
She pauses, seeming utterly lost and confused. "Do you have any questions or concerns?" She asks as she tightens her grip on my hip.
Concerns? No. Questions? "Is there a reason you've waited?" I ask as I continue to stroke her hair.
"I just wanted it to be with someone that I feel a connection. Someone I trust." She tells me, looking into my eyes.
"You had a boyfriend, right? You guys never—"
"No," She cuts me off. "I didn't trust him, and for a good reason. He cheated on me," She informs me, pulling her gaze from mine.