Alpha Loren

Ella's POV

Three weeks later, I'd slipped into life with Andrea. It was horrible and painful but I'd learnt to tolerate it. 

Every day, I'd get up, take my pill and make breakfast for us both. Sometimes Chico would help, sometimes he wouldn't. Then he'd put me to use doing whatever job he had going whether that be tending to the latest bullet victim, cleaning, cooking or serving food and beer to him and whichever disrespectful, misogynistic friends he had over that evening. He liked to take me out of the house too, whether that be because he needed my assistance distracting or persuading someone or simply just to drag me along.

I lost count of the number of times I watched him kill someone. At first, the coldness and complete emptiness in his eyes frightened me. I guess how easily he could just take a life without a second thought made me realise how dangerous he really was. But although with every death my heart sunk, the ringing in my ears from the shot of a bullet became normal and his utter lack of emotion no longer phased me. 

When he wanted to sleep with me, which was three or four times a week, was by far the worst. Even though I knew there was nothing I could do to stop it, the guilt I felt was terrible. Everything else I became numb to overtime but with this, I felt the same excruciating pain every time no matter how much tequila he'd given me beforehand.

One evening afterwards, I sat with my knees against my chest against the headboard as he sat next to me, laid out comfortably as he put a cigarette in his mouth. 

"Want one?" he offered.

"No," I whispered almost inaudibly.

"Try it," he urged.

I could tell by his tone that it wasn't a choice so I took one out of the box he was holding out to me and held it in my fingers.

He brought my hand to my mouth and rested it in my lips before lighting it and then lighting his own.

It filled my lungs with the most revolting ash and smoke that burnt and itched. But I didn't cough or reach for water, I just stayed still and felt the sting scratch at my throat. It was a distraction if nothing else.

"You ever smoked pot, Blanca?" he asked.

"No."

"Your Alpha didn't let you, huh?" he said with a slight laugh. 

"I have kids," I replied.

"Shit yeh you do," he said. "A lot of fucking kids. But they aren't your problem anymore and you're with me now."

"I'd rather just sleep," I told him, handing him my barely touched cigarette before scrambling under the covers.

"Another time," he said. "Sweet dreams."

listened until he finished his cigarette and had fallen asleep before rolling onto my back

and I felt

you ever sleep, Blanca?"

I run out of things to think about," I replied quietly.

look like I haven't been treating you right," he said pulling

been treating me right

in the large window and onto the

innocent rest, he looked evil. Even when his piercing, satanic eyes were covered, a low sense of

did you get like this?" I asked

and looked at me

questioned

powerful man at only nineteen despite being born a rogue," I elaborated treading

am? It's a long story," he slurred, his Mexican accent coming out strong as he

for a while and the

propped himself up on his

My mother was his high school summer fling," he began. "She wasn't his mate so when she fell pregnant with me at sixteen, my Grandfather, who was Alpha at

why you are so strong?" I asked.

he replied. "I didn't get no pack handed to me. I had to find my own way,

I questioned genuinely curious.

He shrugged.

ten. Of course, as the son of another man, he hated me so naturally, abandoned me in the middle of the desert. From there, I found my way to a warehouse containing a gang of criminals that adopted me and taught me their

"Maybe you should find her. Or

anything to do with me," he said with a laugh. "I'm the kid

a fucked up

better off. I have everything I want now," he

love," I

"Love is bullshit."

that because you've never felt it," I replied. "So you've given up on it,

seconds, "To give up on it

shit," I stated. "No wonder you're

asked raising an eyebrow as his tone hardened

I had seen another side to Andrea. More personable, softer...perhaps even human. But

I mumbled quietly as I rested my head back on the