Chapter Sixty–Nine 

‘Reach for it... 

‘Stretch... 

I dug deep within myself, searching where I had felt that familiar energy first stem from. Before it used to always feel like it was just out of arm‘s length, as if only the tip of my fingernail could graze it, but now it felt as though I needed several more appendages just to get anywhere near it. 

But it was there. I had to believe that it hadn‘t just been my imagination. 

Stretch just a little further...‘ 

But then I exhaled quickly in release, panting from the strain it had caused to my body. 

I‘d been sitting on my bed practising ever since arriving back at my guest lodgings. However, since starting over an hour ago, there had been little to show in progress. 

I knew there had to be a trick to this, some sort of internal cue to summon it. Elder Luke had mentioned that this energy was something that could be trained but I was now trying to accomplish it with a severe handicap. So naturally, a part of me was kicking myself for not learning this prior to the collar. 

I threw myself backwards on the bed, laying down in defeat. This was becoming infuriating, not to mention exhausting. How was I meant to practice something if I couldn‘t even begin to grasp it? This 

stupid energy that was a byproduct of my curse. 

Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried again once more, digging as deep as physically possible. 

Grab it already. It‘s there. It‘s literally right there.’ 

Just grab it! 

... And then I felt it. 

My eyes immediately flew open as I felt the energy weakly pulse inside me. 

Just a dim flickering. Not much, but just enough to know it was there. 

‘HOLD IT. 

| gritted my teeth, fighting against all the different forces working against me... the collar, my now weaker body, the pure effort required to just utilise the energy itself... but it wasn‘t enough. 

| exhaled once more in release, heaving at the air around me. 

It was gone. Gone just as quickly as it had shown itself. 

But I couldn‘t discredit the noticeable differences and how they were definitely better when compared to my past experiences. There was no dizziness... no nosebleeds… no nausea. Not yet at least. It was mostly just aching and exhaustion from the attempts. 

What had been the trigger? My frustration? ...Emotion? I supposed that made sense. All the times it had come to me in the past were under circumstances of higher emotional investment. But would knowing that actually make it any easier? 

For now, I just needed to repeat this over and over again until I trained my body to grasp it on will, each time trying to hold it for a few seconds longer. 

And so, even though I knew how much it was probably going to hurt, I smiled at the excruciatingly slow grind ahead of me. 

How naive of me to think that at one point i‘d thoughi squats were bad 

“What the hell happened to you?” Aletic asked the next morning, eyeing off my appearance 

1 yawned but managed to bow my head in greeting per protocol 

“Good morning,” I said sleepily. “I didn‘t get much rest. Sorry for all of the fuss.” 

“I thought you were dead,” he said with all seriousness 

I‘d ended up staying up all night practising, pushing myself to my limit, before finally passing out sometime in the early morning My exhaustion had been so bad though that an attendant had to enter my guest lodgings with a master key after I‘d failed to answer the door. Apparently. Alenc had nearly smashed it down from knocking and had thought something had happened to me 

In actuality, I was just dead to the world sleeping. 

“I‘m sorry,” I repeated, though this time trying to make it sound more genuine. 

He sighed but his shoulders didn‘t relax. “It‘s fine. Grab your stuff and let‘s get going.” 

I wondered whether this had scared him off from ever bringing me with him again but I went back inside t o pack without questioning it. Truthfully, I wasn‘t even sure if I ever wanted to go to another meeting like this again but knew it was best not to push my luck whilst he was like this. I could tell that what I‘d done had really struck a nerve with him. 

since the morning but my sleepless

without much energy left to resist, I eventually drifted off to sleep in the car.

a voice called out to

stirred but didn‘t want to move, my eyelids

get up,” it repeated.

to see

said, unbuckling his

followed behind him, my moves sluggish. Though part of my reluctance siemmed from weighing up whether it would be better to

to ignore them. All of them probably had a plethora of questions that I didn‘t care to answer. Instead, I followed silently behind Aleric all the way until we made it to the

it. What would happen when I went back in there? Would I never want

my room, eyeing the door off sceptically. I felt sick inside just

me and

first thing in the morning. Hopefully, he won‘t care whether you remain in the Luna quarters and we can

Chapter Sixty Nine 

probably wasn‘t making the situation any better given the

no importance. And yet they held more weight over me than I‘d ever dare to admit aloud. Why was it that this place continued to drain me more than anything else

finally decided. ‘I am not her and I

second to take it all in.

I pushed it as far back as I

goddamn Goddess, then there was no way I was going to let a room

stronger. And it had already started.

Hopefully, within all of that, I could also prevent an apocalypse in the process. It was just

to Aleric, my tone dismissing him. “I‘ll be okay from here.”

should insist on staying or not, but

the door. “Have a good rest and I‘ll see

start thinking you have no friends,” I joked.

smiled. “Unfortunately, just one very annoying

spoken naturally to one another since back when I was still a Beta heir. This trip had been a nice reminder of what it felt like to speak freely again.

I‘m not going there.‘

off the thoughts quickly and threw my bag down by the door, walking towards my room.

being a mistake. I‘d been broken already once and had stupidly dragged myself back into that pit

telling you that you were right. At least about one thing. Are

I wasn‘t under any false pretence. Even though my make–up covered up the worst of m y exhaustion, I knew she would still be

it was time to train. No good wasting

speak to Aleric soon about possibly resuming my physical training, even though I was fully aware that I would still remain weak no matter how much I worked out. But even

Chapter Sixty Nine 

harder of the two.

the energy inside me for longer periods of time. And whilst it may have only been

sometime after dark. I‘d had two nights of minimal sleep and my body

barely any strength left inside... I passed out.

awoken by the sound of my front door clicking open, a creak groaning

the time via the clock on my bedside table.

the morning. Why would anyone be here

over my nightgown. If this was an attendant then they were about to have hell to pay for waking me without good reason.

called

Silence. 

...Aleric...?” 

of someone‘s footsteps

bad. This was

held my breath, trying desperately to listen to the darkness around m e. But I knew the unfortunate reality was that they would be able to see me easily with their better vision. Hell, maybe they

were

now anyway. Order them to stand down? No,

would be able to hear me and get here faster than anyone

quickly inhaled as much as I could within

ALE–.” 

a wall of muscle encircling around

his grip, hopelessly fighting against him, but I knew it was pointless. By even werewolf standards, this guy was built impossibly large. Maybe even larger than some of our pack‘s best warriors. And right now I didn‘t even qualify for standard

the hell was this

his hand, binding my mouth from making any further attempts to call for help. There was nothing I could do, nowhere I could move, and so he was able to

Chapter Sixty–Nine 

without any

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